I am Mediocrity

A performance piece in progress – I’m in a weird mood today.
I am Mediocrity.
I am Good, but not good enough;

not for my parents; who love my ideals , my candour,

but not that I indulge in a glass; a tattoo; a swear;

I don’t do drugs, but I am not the pious one they prefer.

I am mediocrity.

I am Smart, but not smart enough;

Not enough to send rockets into space, write code with ease

Not enough to appease 

The employers of my dreams.

I am mediocrity.

I am Pretty, but not pretty enough;

not for the boys I loved; who went chasing after those prettier than me;

not for the ones I couldn’t confess to – wait come back! we were meant to be!

I am mediocrity!

I am talented, but not talented enough;

enough to hold a note in key; but not enough to draw NYC from memory;

I am mediocrity;

I am angry; but not angry enough;

Never angry enough to change!

The injustices that we face every fucking day!

I am gay, but not gay enough;

Just because I prefer to kiss boys to girls, just because

I don’t have the guts to confess to her;

her with curves just like mine

that to hold her would be oh, so divine;

I am depressed, but not depressed enough;

Is it because my scars have faded? because I no longer cry on the outside?

I get up in the morning because I have work to do;

is it because I always seem to be smiling in front of you?

I AM MEDIOCRITY;

I am a life without meaning,

A rebel without a cause,

fated to be on my stage but never to glean

more than a scattered applause;

No ovation for me, not even an angry boo;

I cant do an encore for the likes of you!

I am mediocrity! So average that I just  fade

into the background; a piece of furniture; A rug; a stain;

A familiar zit on an ex’s forehead.

I am mediocrity! No one takes mediocrity seriously

until that subject of mediocrity-

is dead.

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